Dark-winged beetle

If you had told me 10 years ago that on a humid day in June, I would nurse a sick beetle back from the dead, I'd never have believed you. And yet, that is exactly what I did today. Here are the photos to prove it:


Pregnancy Insomnia

I woke up at 1:13am to go to the bathroom.
It is now 3:56am.

Obviously, I'm still awake.

I'm really, really hot.
I'm really, really big.
I'm really, really feeling the heart burn.
I'm bloated.

I probably shouldn't have eaten that bacon cheeseburger for dinner.
Or that basket of fries.
Or the strawberry shortcake dessert.

On the bright side. At least I'm just bloated, not "really, really bloated." But, I have a bad feeling the "really, really bloated" phase is just around the corner. My feet feel more and more like over-filled water ballons every day.

Dave will be happy to know that while I lay in bed for over an hour trying to get back to sleep, I practiced my labor breathing techniques. I thought for sure that would put me to sleep. No dice. And just so you know, it really didn't make the "uncomfortable lying in bed awake thing" any better. It also didn't make me feel less hot. Or less bloated.

So how exactly is it going to help with the most excruciating pain ever? Maybe I'm doing it wrong.

I wish there was a conference talk I could listen to on my ipod. Nothing lulls me to sleep quite like a conference talk...


10 Things I Hate About Carrie (ps: Happy B-day)

I'm sure on a blogging spree right now. Can you believe it? 5 posts in 5 days? But enough about me. It is the eve of one of my favorite holidays on earth... the birth of Carrie Sioux Lewis Denham. I'm not even sure how old she is; I could subtract 6 from my age, but then I'd have to know how old I am. Whatever.

Carrie really kicked off an awesome posting tradition on my b-day last year. I'd love to list the 20-odd things I love about Carrie, but it seems so unoriginal. So instead, I am challenging myself to find 10 things I hate about Carrie, in honor of her birth... because I'm pretty sure 10 Things I Hate About You is her all time favorite movie. Or is it Blue Crush? At any rate...

10. I hate that Carrie and Dave came to visit, and these pictures are the only two I took of their whole trip. Why didn't I take more? How great would it be to have photos of us watching Friday Night Lights, or going into the city, or Dave taking my oven apart? But no. Just these two shots of Carrie in her Rockies shirt, right before we went running. It was a great run, by the way.

9. I hate Carrie's metabolism. It's never seemed fair to me that she can eat... and eat... and eat... and still be so FREAKING skinny. Even now, with an almost fully grown infant in her body, only her stomach is fat. Not fair.

8. On the note of genetic inequity, I hate that Carrie is so much taller than me. She claims to be 5'8", which would make her 4 inches taller than my claim of 5'4". Of course we're both rounding up an inch, but the difference is still 4 inches. Again, not fair.

7. I hate that she married Dave. With him around, Travis will never be the favorite son-in-law. Dave just has too many fix it skills, and appreciates food in a way that strokes my mom's ego until she purrs. If she had married Brady, my mom would probably have a bust made of Travis and lay flowers in front of it each day.

6. I hate that she has brown eyes. I want them!! At least my son got a set just as pretty as Carrie's.

5. I hate that she has to visit Dr. Hong. ha ha.

4. I hate that she bought Seven Jeans before I did. Of course she made up for this by giving me my first pair of Sevens almost 6 years ago. I know they are probably horribly out of style now, and my first pair is literally hanging together by a thread (both knees and the crotch are shot), but I can't throw them away.

3. I hate that she's more frugal than I. I want to be the miser in the family! But did I mention I have the best credit that Jim L. has ever seen? That's got to count for something, right? (Do you like how I'm actually making this post all about me?)

2. I hate that she loved Ashes. Well not really, but I'm stretching here and it only seemed fair to take a potshot at Ashes. Oh wait I just thought of a better one. I hate that she gets to go to the mountain house whenever she wants, and I don't.

and the #1 thing I hate about Carrie is:

1. I hate hate HATE that Carrie doesn't live by me. I wish so badly we lived close by, so I could strategically show up when she's made portobello sandwiches for dinner, or babysit her baby, or watch the Bachelorette together. Life would be so great if we could see each other every day.

Well. I don't know if that ended up being as creative as I thought, but you get the message. I LOVE YOU CARRIE!!! I'm so glad you were born. And really, since I raised (reared) you myself, I got to make all my mistakes on you. Which explains why my children are turning out so perfectly.

I hope you have a stellar b-day, where you get to gorge yourself on roasted pineapple and buffalo burgers, with a brownie dough chaser. I also really hope you don't have heartburn tomorrow night. And for Dave's sake, I hope you don't snore tonight.

Thanks for being the best friend a girl could want.

*update: Carrie just sent me an email informing me that in fact, the blockbuster smash hit Center Stage might actually be her favorite movie of all time. 


Gratuitous leg shot

I couldn't resist. This picture was taken at the time of the Dora photos, but I thought it deserved it's own post.

Dora Update

We had to switch things around, TV-wise, at our house lately. Now that's sunnier, our wall projector will only work at night (it's just too bright in the house to see the picture). For quite a while I had stacked our ghetto-fabulous TV and VCR on the floor, but Oz was thwarting himself left and right. He'd hit the power button with his knee. He'd unplug the video in cable. I was having to go over every 2 minutes to put the show back on, which defeats the purpose of him watching a show in the first place. So last week we brought down this from C's room, and Travis pinned the cables under the weight of the TV, so he can't turn it off easily anymore. Here's to hours of baby entertainment!

Thought you'd like to see him in action, watching his favorite seniorita:

He can even watch while cocking his foot:



Well, it happened again. I had another incredible baby shower. I know, I'm completely spoiled. How can one person have so many amazing friends and family? The 3 ladies below - Pam, Christina and Kacey totally out did themselves. It was an absolutely beautiful event!

It was an outdoor/garden affair with a delicious lunch, beautifully set tables with gorgeous centerpieces (I wish I had a picture!), 2 fun games, and of course great company.

You can tell my friends and family know me well. What does Carrie love more than anything? CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN! I can't believe I was treated with chocolate fondue at not one but TWO showers!

The other food choices (as if chocolate fountain isn't enough) were delicious and I'm getting VERY hungry thinking about them. I could really go for a repeat lunch right now. I ate my fair share of:

-3 kinds of homemade muffins - bran, raspberry, and zucchini chocolate chip. Yes, I had one of each...and then tried them each again...just to be safe.

-2 flavors of homemade chicken salad (curry and regular) with croissants for sandwiches.
-Lots of fresh fruit
-Lots of fresh veggies

-Yummy fruit water. I know...hard to imagine water being good enough to note, but it was so tasty!
-And my new official craving, Italian sodas from Whole Foods. I am going to have to go buy some today. I highly recommend you try the pear flavor. Now. If possible.

I got an incredible abundance of darling clothes, toys, books, diapers, etc. Once again picking "favorite" gifts is out of the question - everything was too adorable. But I thought I would note two of the gifts just for fun.

My mom gave me a book I haven't ever seen before, "Good Night Denver." Since Dave and I live in and love Denver this was a great surprise. Each page talks about the attractions of Denver, including a page dedicated just to our little neighborhood! Since Denver isn't the only cool place in the world (hard to believe, I know) this company has made books for lots of locations. Check out the following link for a board book featuring your favorite city/state: http://goodnightourworld.com/

Second, check out this adorable toy. This is none other than a super soft, HAND MADE ball courtesy of miss Christina!

First, it should be noted that the ball is my favorite color scheme - blue and brown. Second the fabric is so soft you must rub it against your cheek not once but twice to fully experience the joy. And last - note the darling little ribbons/tags sewn in all the seams so my little man has hours of entertainment! I'm incredibly impressed, especially because this is an idea and pattern she MADE UP!

I hate to be too cheesy, but I just have to take this opportunity to say how much I love my friends. They are just the nicest, coolest, sweetest, most talented girls you could ever hope to know. Pam, Christina, and Kacey - THANK YOU for all the time and hard work you put into that perfect party!

And in closing, I thought I would post the questions from a shower game Kacey put together. She asked Dave questions in advance, and then asked me them at the shower to see how aligned we are in our future parenting techniques. Looks like Dave and I have some things to work out...


1. Will you let your son play with dolls?
Carrie: Sure, why not? We can call them action figures.
Dave: If by dolls you mean shards of glass, nails, and gasoline then yes.

2. Sports, or math club?
Carrie: Both!
Dave: How about both. We are really hoping he gets Carrie's brains, and hand-eye coordination and my fearlessness, common sense, and sense of direction. All of those combined should make a good ball player and a smart kid.

3. How long will you let your baby "cry it out" in the middle of the night before going in to him?
Carrie: 30 minutes?
Dave: I thought babies only cried in church.

4. How many hours of sleep will you get per night in the first 3 weeks? How many hours of sleep will Carrie get?
Carrie: Maybe I'll get 4 hours, and Dave will get 6?
Dave: Well if the past 3 months are indicative of the future I will be getting a lot less sleep than Carrie. She now snores like a 75 year old man.

5. At what age will you allow your son to try Mountain Dew?
Carrie: I hope he makes it to his first birthday without having tried soda
Dave: Mountain Dew? That is like water. You should have asked a hard question like "At what age will you allow your son to try Monster Energy Drinks?"

6. What will you do when your child throws sand into the eyes of another child at the playground?
Carrie: Time out for the little man!
Dave: I hope he is bigger than the other kid and I am bigger than that kid's dad.

7. Who is in charge of discipline?
Carrie: Me for the day to day, Dave for the big offenses
Dave: Carrie. Now she is going to have two people to discipline. Boy and I are going to be a team.

8. How do you respond to a full-out screaming temper tantrum while shopping for groceries - keep in mind your cart is FULL?
Carrie: Abandon ship!
Dave: I only go to the store for soda, ice cream, and candy. No kid would throw a tantrum with that list.

9. Sunscreen - SPF 15, or SPF 50?
Carrie: 50 of course! Dave better say 50!
Dave: We are going to have to see whose skin he got.

10. What will your role be in the delivery room?
Carrie: Dave should support me, and massage me a lot
Dave: I will be doing the breathing for Carrie b/c she hasn't been practicing it at all.

11. How old will your son be when he mows his first lawn professionally?
Carrie: Eight
Dave: The same age he gets a motorcycle.

12. What will you let him get away with that will drive your spouse the most crazy?
Carrie: When I let baby play on the grass.
Dave: When he is to clean his room I will be fine with him just shoving everything in his closet and shutting the door. Carrie would want him to actually put things away.


She's discovered the Internet

S had a whale project in April... this was the beginning. She was assigned the sperm whale, and I showed her how to get onto Google to look up images of the sperm whale. You can probably see where this is going, but I was naive and didn't. On one occasion she left off the "whales" and came up with many pictures related to "sperm". Ugh. I'm still not exactly what she saw (she clearly didn't understand it either... thank goodness) but we had a talk about how we always need to be together when she is using Google or You Tube. I should have been more prepared... back last summer she had her aunt take her to Webkinz.com, but Aunt Sally misheard her and typed in "Webkittens.com" and was taken to a porn site. Because of that we've bookmarked appropriate sites for them on their computer, but she loves to get onto mine where there is no restricted access.

About a month after the sperm incident, I heard some nasty language coming from the office. C and I had been watching Lego Star Wars movies on YouTube earlier, and it was still up, and S was watching something called "Sponge Bob Sex Box." In the 10 seconds it was on I heard the F word, the A word, and the S word. This time the lecture about going on sites alone was much more emphatic, as you can imagine.

About 2 weeks ago she came home with her assignment for their insect projects at school. She had been assigned the Hickory Horned Devil... but she got confused on the name and walked in and said, "Mom! We've got to get on Google and search for my insect... I got the horny devil!"


Worst movie EVER

We just got home from date night, where we went out for burritos and then to see the new M. Night Shamalayan movie, The Happening. This review sums the movie up pretty well. I'm really tired, but I had to get this post up ASAP to prevent as many people as possible from seeing it (in case you were planning on the 9 AM show on Saturday).

The spookiest thing about the whole movie was that we had accidentally bought tickets to an assigned seated theatre. The guys picked out our seats, and we were all sitting there when the lady came to check our tickets. We were all sitting in exactly the seats we had been assigned... not off by even one chair, and the theatre had been empty when we went in.

Friday the 13th, baby.

*I forgot to mention that Ashley was telling everyone in the movie theater, and the bathroom of the theater, NOT to go see the movie. She too was very interested in preventing disappointment. I'm seriously considering writing a letter to Mr. Shamalyan.


It didn't really occur to me...

...that when we tore out the existing tile and shower walls in our upstairs bathroom, a thick layer of dust and sand would be kicked up into our home and settle over EVERY SINGLE SURFACE of the upstairs.

When I say every surface, I mean every surface. Nothing was spared.

I guess I better get cleaning. I spent 4 hours cleaning last night and only finished the kitchen. I still have 4 others rooms to clean.


Ta Da!

All done with 7 weeks to spare!



So what now? Well - Dave decided this morning the only logical thing to do was to begin tearing apart our upstairs bathroom...

(For a refresher on the birthing process of the bathroom click here and here.)


I've been showered

As you will see in the picture below, I didn't have any fun at all at my baby shower.

I know, I know. I look ridiculously happy. Needless to say, it was a great night.

I had good intentions to fully document all the fabulous food and people, but I ended up having way too much fun to take pictures. I asked around, and turns out no one took pictures of the food. When I explain what the food choices were I think you will understand. It is hard to take pictures of food when your focus is on eating food.

The menu was an array of delectable homemade appetizers including:

-Mini grilled sandwiches with porcini mushrooms and fontina cheese. You can catch a glimpse of them being grilled by miss Laura in the picture below

-Mini crab cakes with cilantro
-Delightfully stuffed mushrooms
-Mini Greek spanakopita quiche bites
-Mini pizzas with prosciutto, fontina cheese, and basil
-An array of every veggie known to man plus yummy dip

Isn't my mom adorable in her polka dot dress? I wonder where she got it - oh wait, I gave it to her! I'm such a good daughter.

And for dessert:
-An array of fruit (kiwi, blackberries, pineapple, strawberries, watermelon, honey dew and blue berries) with chocolate & cream fondue for dipping

Unfortunately I was so distracted by my fabulous guests that I wasn't able to completely eat myself sick (as I would have preferred). But I did get 2 plates of appetizers and 1 plate of fruit and chocolate.

We had food, presents, and lots of fun conversations with the wonderful guests! I would detail my favorite gifts with pictures - but this would be an absolutely impossible feat because everything I received was so adorable!

Thank you to the WONDERFUL hosts (Laura and Leslie) for throwing me such a great party! Aren't they beautiful?

And just for fun, here is a picture of me before the shower at 30 weeks. I really need to find a new spot to take pictures, and a new pose.

I made Dave take 7 of these pictures before I would believe this is what I look like. I was pretty sure it was just the wrong angle with the first six takes. When I came out of the bedroom in this get-up he started chuckling and I said:
"This outfit makes me look really pregnant - huh?"
Dave responded "No...I think it is the belly that makes you look pregnant."

Now that just doesn't make any sense at all.



As some of you may recall I hatched an elaborate plan that involved everyone I know in the tri-state area meeting up with each other, and driving me a crib (relay style) from Logan Utah to Colorado. This was an attempt to save $200.

What I had forgotten was the power of my fabulous bartering skills. I went to the local store equipped with all sorts of research and actually talked them down $165 on the crib price! WAHOO! Sure it took 2 hours, and quite a few awkward moments, but in the end - I triumphed. Never underestimate the power of the blank stare.

Crib store manager: "Well you see, you can't really compare our prices to on-line prices because shipping a crib can be so expensive."
Carrie: blank stare
Crib store manager: "And with gas prices going up, our freight charges are through the roof!"
Carrie: blank stare
Crib store manager: "If I drop the price much more, I'll be taking a loss."
Carrie: blank stare

So the crib is now in my possession and set up in the baby's room. I wish I had a camera so I could post a picture.

One day I'll get my camera back and then I'll be able to post pictures of the fabulous baby shower, the finished bathroom, and the not-so-little sausages that connect my hips and my feet. Every day I get a bit plumper and juicier...I hope no one tries to eat me.