I'm moving...

The question is - should I move to Wyoming or Massachusetts?

I can't handle living in a swing state anymore. I've had it. Last week Denver received the 2nd highest number of political ads in the COUNTRY!

I absolutely hate watching TV. And not for the normal reasons I hate watching TV which include:

1. The fact that we are too cheap for cable, our bunny ears don't work, and so every 30 seconds or so the sound on our 5 stations phases out, and the picture goes to black and white.
2. Our new flat screen TV spontaneously turns off every 6 minutes. We have no idea why. And no, we don't have a warranty.

Those are small annoyances compared to the political ads that run EVERY FIVE SECONDS, ON EVERY CHANNEL, ALL HOURS OF THE DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

These smear campaigns do nothing more than confirm my fear that both candidates are totally lame. Why don't they spend their time and money educating us on who they are and what they believe instead of vilifying their opponent?

Poor Marilyn Musgrave. If you live in Colorado - I don't need to say any more. I mean really...if half the stuff they say is true, shouldn't we just go ahead and ship her off to Guantanamo?

And when did Boulder become not only an adjective, but also a bad word? "BOULDER Mark Udall did this, and BOULDER Mark Udall did that." Should I be ashamed of my hometown?

To prove things are out of control around here, I have exhibit A:

Apparently the pre-made signs which adorn our neighbors windows, front door, and cars just aren't cutting it anymore. Our next door neighbors actually busted out the construction paper and sharpies to create THEIR OWN political campaign.

(NOTE: dear neighbors if you are reading this...we do love you. But your homemade sign cracks me up. Thanks again for the grapes - they are delicious!)

We made the cardinal mistake of having a Bush sign in our yard during one of the last elections. Being the only Republicans in a 10 mile radius, the whole community has decided to direct their campaign effort at us. SEVERAL people dropped by minutes before Barack's speech during the democratic national convention to make sure "we had the TV tuned to the right station."

And when did smear ads become 30 second horror movies? Between the dark voices, scary music, and low lighting - sometimes it takes me a second to realize it is a political ad and not a preview for a Halloween movie. I'm just waiting for someone to introduce a guy in a mask, with a chain saw, and some blood. Now THAT would get my vote.

And the last reason I've had it with this election: everyone thinks my baby's name is Trig. Thanks a lot Sarah Palin.


sara said...

trig. i love it.

i had a couple people ask me if scout was named scalp. sigh.

Christina said...

oh that cracks me up! i love the signage in case the actual poster isn't enough to sway you to vote for obama

Mom said...

It is even worse, the ads say Boulder "Liberal" Mark Udall... Two adjectives. Like everyone in Boulder is liberal and crazy. (However there are an awfully lot of honk'n liberals here.) I LOVE Boulder, but I love it less during election time.

Thank heavens I rarely watch TV.

carrie said...

mmm...a new suspicious adjective.

honk'n? really?

ha ha ha ha

Missy said...

I really like people asking Sarah if Scout was named Scalp....I agree, could the lighting and music in the ads make things seems any more grim and desperate? I'd like the candidates to put all their advertising money towards helping out a bank or two...I know that isn't going to happen, but it would get my vote.

Mark said...

Remember, when the representatives you are voting for no longer represent your opinions, you can take up arms and overthrow the government. Feel free to read more about it on my web site www.randomcrazymilitiainutah.org

Pull all of your money out of the bank and buy guns n' ammo.

ps. I just want to thank Carrie for two blog entries this week. I kept checking my rss feed for the blog and was bitterly disappointed.

Yah Yah said...

I am LAURA LEWIS and...

I approve this POST

Yah Yah said...

Two suggestions:

1- When your neighbors come to the door, explain your TV woes and ask for a donation to get cable and fix the TV so you can watch the debate.

2 - Be thankful we live in a free country where we can vote.

Smiths said...

Ha! All the schmearing (is that a word?) is one reason that i HATE politics! And, do they really have to spend so much money to say bad and scary things about each other? I agree, couldn't it go towards something good? Then maybe I would vote for them, and listen to what they have to say.