The Beast With-in

Thanks everyone for your congrats on the mini human. I thought I would answer a few of your questions...but first, let me tell you about Saturday morning.

I was in Frisco (local mountain town) with Dave and my mom. We went out to breakfast at my favorite little joint; "The Log Cabin Cafe." I was incredibly torn between breakfast choices, and could not bring myself to settle on a meal. Typically my favorite item at this restaurant is the veggie egg sandwich. But I was hesitant to order this delightful item as I've heard horror stories of women eating their favorite meal during pregnancy, getting sick, and never being able to eat it again. In addition, blueberry pancakes have been one of my "go-to" meals since pregnancy has ensued. Now you see the difficult dilemma I was facing.

My mom was set to order one gigantic blueberry and pecan pancake. I tried to talk her into splitting it with me (and then I would still get myself the egg sandwich)...but she wasn't thrilled with the idea of being stuck with only a half a pancake. Who can blame her? Then it dawned on me - she could order TWO pancakes and just give me one of hers! In total relief I shut my menu and felt I had dodged near disaster. I figured if the egg sandwich smelled the least bit funny, I would push it aside and focus on my pancake. But if the sandwich tasted good I would stick with that and pawn the extra pancake off on Dave.

The waitress came to the table and Dave and I placed our orders. Then, my mom ordered "A short stack of pancakes - one with blueberries and pecans, and one with just blueberries." The waitress said "If I place the order that way the kitchen will mess it up...so I'll just put in two separate orders for single pancakes.”

With that she walked away and I realized what had just happened. I had officially ordered myself two breakfasts.

My two breakfasts arrived and both smelled and tasted delightful. So I threw caution to the wind, and went ahead and ate both breakfasts (after all the shame is in ordering two breakfasts not eating them right?) Did I mention I also ate half of my mom’s side of bacon? When breakfast was over, we all jumped in the car and headed for Denver. 20 minutes later I said, "I’m so glad I got both the sandwich and the pancake. They were both delicious, and I don’t even feel overly full!" Dave and my mom just looked at me funny as if to say, "Are you seriously still talking about breakfast?"

I tell you this story only to illustrate the theme of my pregnancy – food. Since I have been pregnant all I think about or talk about is food. When is the next meal and what will it be? During the first 11 weeks I was horribly sick, and food was the bane of my existence. I had constant nausea that would dramatically increase or decrease based on how much food was in my tummy. The longer I went without food, the worse the nausea would become. Nothing ever sounded good so every 45 minutes I would be near tears at the thought of having to force feed myself YET AGAIN, especially since I ran out of food ideas on day 2 of pregnancy. But I would choke something down and the nausea would retreat a bit.

The worst day was when food seemed to have no power over my nausea. Typically if I didn’t feel better after eating it meant I hadn’t eaten enough, or hadn’t eaten the right thing. So one sad day I kept eating and eating and the nausea only got worse and worse. Finally at dinner time determined to win the battle, I force fed myself a beef brisket sandwich with pickles and BBQ sauce. Each bite was extremely painful, but I knew I had to press forward. 30 minutes after the BBQ beef was down I ran to the bathroom, and spent the next 3 hours watching everything I had forced down that day come up. Turns out I had the stomach flu in addition to being pregnant. Go figure. Tip: don’t force feed yourself a BBQ beef brisket sandwich with pickles if you have the stomach flu.

During this period of time I also had zero energy. Dave would come home and the house would be a total disaster. I would be lying in bed, in the dark, in my PJs, with my laptop by my side as I attempted to "work." The bedroom/bed would be covered with remnants from the meals of the day including 5 bowls, 3 spoons, 7 plates, 8 forks, 6 cups, and crumbs covering the length of the bed.

Dave would tip toe in and say "How do you feel?" I remember one day he looked at me with trepidation and asked quietly "do you think things will ever go back to normal?" Poor guy. He was a real trooper.

Week 11 was a huge turning point. The nausea mercifully subsided, the energy came back, and I was myself again! It has been a glorious 5 weeks and I feel 100 billion times better. Of course I still need to eat every 2 to 3 hours, and am still obviously obsessed with food. But I can actually exercise, clean, work, cook, and smile. Isn't smiling wonderful?

So there you have it people. That's how pregnancy has gone thus far. I don't know how you people are pregnant with kids. I could barely take care of myself that first trimester let alone another human being. I keep voicing this concern to friends who are moms, and they assure me that is what the TV is for.

I am really excited to have a little baby join our life. Time can not possibly go fast enough. Did I mention on Sunday someone asked me if I was having twins? Maybe I should lay off the double breakfasts.